Emerging 'isms' of the 21st. Century

Hi Friends,
Just a few humorous ones in jest, with malice to none!!
Cheers,

Emerging 'isms' of the 21st. Century.

INFOSYSism
You have a 1000 poor cows. You put them on a nice campus, & send them one at a time to the US for milking.

WIPROism
GE has a cow. You take 49% of the milk.

SATYAMism
You have a cow. You have its milk. But don't know what to do with it!

DELLism
Intel has a Goat. Samsung has a Camel. Buy milk from both & sell it as Cow's milk.

IBMism
You have old stubborn cows. You sell them as pet dogs to innocent small businessmen.

MICROSOFTism
You have a cow. Force the world to buy milk from you. Spend a million dollars to feed poorer cows.

SUNism
You have a bull. It doesn't give milk. You hate Microsoft.

ORACLEism
You have a cow. You don't know which side to milk, so you sell tools to help milk cows.

SAPism
You don't have a cow You sell milking solutions for cows implemented by milking consultants.

APPLEism
You have a cow. You sell iMilk.

SONYism
You have a cow. You spend $50 mn to develop the world's thinnest milk.

CITIBANKism
Welcome to Citibank. If you have a cow, press 1. If you have a bull, press 2...stay on line if you'd like our customer care to milk it for you.

HPism
You don't know if what you have is a cow. You sell complete milking solutions through authorised resellers only.

GEism
You have a donkey. People think you have a 100-year old cow. If someone finds out, that's his imagination at work.

RELIANCEism
You don't yet have a cow. You sell empty cans to people for Rs. 501, because Dhirubhai wanted everyone to have milk.

TATAism
You have a very old cow. You re-brand it as TATA Indicow.

More

The Confused Times
PARSIism
You are an Indian Cow, with 1000yrs. of History in the land.
You still proclaim you are a Persian Cow; a direct descendent 'Cyrus the Great' and expect the 'Diaspora Parsi to believe this BULL!

N0 9715, Wednesday 16 Dec 09, Nita Jaggi

Driving back to Bangalore from Coimbatore today so not spending time on adding pictures and links. NJ has used herself in 24D
ACROSS
 7  - Stripped to the waist maybe, for some horsemen (8) - BAREBACK [DD]
 9  - Sensation of a light mattress let out half dry (6) - T{ICK}LE* Anno pending
11 - Plastic film (9) - CELLULOID [DD]
12 - Social outcast has a device when the Vatican left for Portugal (5) - LE(-v+p)ER
13 - Covering the woman in a gathering (6) - {SHE}{AT}H H from ?
14 - Top view of these patterns (5,3) - BIRDS EYE [CD]
17 - Sworn voluntary document that may serve as evidence in court! (9) - AFFIDAVIT [E]
22 - Fail to check the mistake made! (8) - OVERLOOK [E]
23 - Stick firmly on the notice at this place (6) - {AD}{HERE}
25 - Woman’s garment fastened around the waist (5) - SKIRT [CD]
27 - Persuaded the party for the French wine in the last month in retrospect (9) - {CON}{VIN}{CED<-} )
28 - Wine bottle initially made of silver is for the miners (6) - {M}{AG}NUM Anno pending
29 - Same type of byproduct in wine (8) - CONGENER [DD]
DOWN
 1  - Shake off the basic kind of a leading element (7) - ABSCIS*{E}
 2  - Yet to serve up the covered small bread in the food lift (7) - T{ROLL}EY <- )
 3  - Runaway southern birds (5) - (S}{COOT}
 4  - Invoice with double lines (4) - {BI}{LL}
 5  - Team’s head jumper (7) - SKIPPER [DD]
 6  - Levels of doctorates (7) - DEGREES [DD]
 8  - Ample supply for an American man in the United Nations is fruitful without the French character (9) - {BO}{UN}{TIFUL(-fru)*}
10 - Maid works for the soldiers and the lieutenant head commander (7) - {ADMI*}{RA}{L}
15 - Reducing the air for the fish following the start of daybreak (9) - {D}{WIND}{LING}
16 - That’s what a couple undergoes when split! (7) - DIVORCE [E]
18 - Use up the company menus freely (7) - {CO}{NSUME*}
19 - Is up for instance dividing the group of workers to hem in (7) - BESIEGE Anno pending
20 - Danger signals on an endless sandy shore in Ohio is not specific (7) - BEAC(-h){O}{NS}
21 - Sign the last section of alternatives for the sellers (7) - {V}{END}{ORS}
24 - Have fun with the European leader, is the one out to perhaps join the party at last (5) - {E}{NJ}{O}{Y} O from?
26 - Thank you note is in good condition (4) - TRUE Anno pending


GRID